canthearyou | Case 003 | Audio/Action for Route 30

[Oh hi Johto. It’s been a while since Gordon’s called in to let everyone know what he’s been up to, hasn’t it? Not to worry! Today, he’s going to let everyone know everything he’s been doing.]

CALLING IN TO REPORT A NUMBER OF THINGS. ONE, SINCE THE WEATHER’S FINALLY CLEARED UP, I’M HEADING OUT AGAIN ALONG WHAT THE SIGN POST BACK THERE REFERRED TO AS ROUTE 30. I THINK I HAVE ENOUGH SUPPLIES TO MAKE IT TO THE NEXT TOWN. IF I DON’T, I GUESS I’LL HAVE TO MAKE DUE BECAUSE IT WOULD BE A LONG WALK BACK TO THE STORE.

SECOND, RAN INTO A YOUNG MAN ON THIS ROUTE BY THE NAME OF JOEY. HIS POKEMON IS APPARENTLY SOME SORT OF RAT. I THINK HE SAID IT WAS A RATTAT OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT. APPARENTLY IT’S IN THE TOP PERCENTAGE OF ALL RATTATS. NOT SURE HOW THAT WORKS, BUT THAT’S WHAT HE SAID. WONDER WHAT PERCENTAGE OF POKEMON THE ONE I HAVE IS IN.

[He’s still not actually sure what Whismur is called.]

HOW DO YOU FIGURE THAT OUT? ALSO, NOT SURE IF THAT'S THE JOE COOPER WAS REFERRING TO, BUT IT'S THE ONLY JOE I'VE MET SO FAR.

THIRD, I’VE BEEN UNABLE TO LOCATE A WESTERN UNION HERE. DOES ANYONE KNOW WHERE THE CLOSEST ONE IS OR WHAT THE NEAREST EQUIVALENT IS?

AND FOURTH, TWICE NOW MY PHONE HAS DISPLAYED SOMETHING CALLED KANTO DISCOVERY TRAIL. WHAT IS IT AND WHY DO THE POKEMON ON IT KEEP FAINTING FROM VARIOUS DISEASES? IS IT A GAME? OR IS IT SOME SORT OF GUIDE ON HOW GET THROUGH THIS PLACE?

[Guess who accidentally found the apps section of the Gear?]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[why can he hear uncle albert sh-- THOR ALMIGHTY, IS THE VOLUME ON HIS 'GEAR TURNED UP TO MAX?!]

Jeez--WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO LOUD?

[Guess who missed Gordon's arrival?]

WHAT WAS THAT? SOMETHING ABOUT A CLOUD?

[Why does everyone keep talking to him about clouds? There aren't any clouds today.]

LOUD. L-O-U-D.

[Though now he...sort of understands. Sort of.]

YOU KNOW WE CAN HEAR YOU JUST FINE, RIGHT?

I'M GLAD YOU CAN HEAR ME, BUT WHY ARE YOU SPELLING?

[Is there a spelling be going on? What is with this place, jeez.]

BECAUSE YOU--ugh, nevermind... [Yep, he's giving up on that.] DID YOU SAY COOPER? LIKE THE AGENT?

YES. COOPER. SPECIAL AGENT DALE COOPER. WITH THE FBI. DO YOU KNOW HIM?

I'M TRAVELING WITH HIM. [Though if he knew Cooper and was on Route 30...] ARE YOU HIS OTHER FRIEND FROM HOME?

[Carmen only said that you were nicer than Albert... Not that you would make him deaf. =c]

YES, I AM HIS FRIEND. ALSO HIS SUPERVISOR.

[It's okay Hiccup. Hopefully you get used to it. After all, Coop and Albert aren't deaf! Yet!]

THE NAME'S GORDON. GORDON COLE. IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU.

Edited 2012-09-23 20:14 (UTC)

[That is some miracle.]

NICE TO MEET YOU, TOO, I guess. MY NAME'S HICCUP HADDOCK.

I DON'T HEAR ANY HICCUPS.

TRY DRINKING SOME WATER. THAT MIGHT HELP.

NO, MY NAME IS HICCUP.

[Because he didn't already think it was a terrible name...]

YES, I HEARD. YOU HAVE THE HICCUPS. HEARD YOU THE FIRST TIME.

I'M HICCUP. MY NAME IS HICCUP, THAT IS WHAT I HAVE BEEN CALLED SINCE BIRTH. HICCUP HORRENDOUS HADDOCK THE THIRD.

[sob, why is he even having this conversation. After a pause, he thinks it might be good to clarify it again.]

I DON'T HAVE THE HICCUPS.

OKAY, I THINK I UNDERSTAND NOW.

[Yup, he's got this.]

YOU DON'T HAVE THE HICCUPS. BUT YOU CAUGHT SOME SORT OF HADDOCK WITH THE HICCUPS. THAT'S INCREDIBLE. I DIDN'T KNOW FISH COULD HICCUP.

[And once again, he is a talking fishbone.

It's a while before Hiccup actually attempts to say or do anything, as he struggles with the growing desire to simply give up and say his name is Snoopy or Leonardo, but eventually he switches over to video.]

GORDON. [He points at Gordon, then points to himself.] HICCUP.

YOUR NAME IS HICCUP?

[Did he guess right?]

[THANK THE GODS. There is a big sigh of relief and a thumbs up.]

Edited 2012-09-27 16:15 (UTC)

SORRY ABOUT THAT. MY HEARING IS TERRIBLE. WHICH YOU HAVE PROBABLY NOTICED BY NOW.

THAT'S OKAY. I'M USED TO PEOPLE COMMUNICATING WITH ME THROUGH SHOUTING. PEOPLE BACK HOME DID IT ALL THE TIME.

HEARING PROBLEMS PRETTY COMMON WHERE YOU COME FROM?

[Seemed politer than asking if everyone there was just loud.]

NO, I'M JUST A MASSIVE DISAPPOINTMENT.

YOU MISSED YOUR APPOINTMENT?

[People here seem to change topics quickly.]

I'M SORRY. HOPE IT WASN'T BECAUSE YOU WERE TALKING TO ME.

[...Squish the urge to say 'YEP' and go off to that "appointment"...]

I SAID THAT PEOPLE ON BERK JUST YELLED A LOT.

BERK? WHERE IS THAT?

ON THE MERIDIAN OF MISERY.

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[audio] Okay this is the last one I promise.

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whoops [video] on this end.

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